The Muppets turn me on

Holidays confuse me. For whatever reason, families feel obligated to force their negative attractions together and pretend to be normal and functional for one day which always, always, always involves alcohol.

My Uncle's girlfriend Michelle is, hands down, the most insane human I've ever been around. While I've only seen her sober once, it's pretty safe to assume that she has some substantial functions lacking in her noggin. See, Michelle stumbled my way late last night, beer in hand, sat down and proceeded to explain why the Muppets cartoon show turns her on. How do you respond to something of sorts? Smile and nod? Agree? Scoot down a seat cushion? I told her that she was forgetting her cigarettes outside* which got her giggling out the door.

Yesterday was bizarre.

*this statement was used several times throughout the night.