Conforming In The Weirdest Way Possible
I must say that I feel somewhat obligated to write about everything that's been bugging me lately based solely on the fact that that's what my friends are doing! I'm not overly concerned about starting classes in a couple weeks and thankfully, I don't have to worry about moving into dorms, but even then, I'm still feeling rather apprehensive about this certain stage of life I'm in. It just seems that nearly everywhere I turn, there is someone casually preaching to me about the importance of adulthood, now that I'm 18, and I'm sitting here, waiting for that flashing-of-lights moment where suddenly it all makes sense. And suddenly, I'd be 100% responsible and 100% confident and indestructible but here I am... Nerve wracked and chewing on the sides of my fingers.
Anyways, it's become pretty apparent to me that most adults, even well into their thirties still have that indecisiveness and I'm not sure if I find that comforting or horrifying. I'm sitting here trying to comprehend the idea of permanently feeling this way and never having that aforementioned self-realization and the mere thought is completely mind-baffling. Sure, everyone's different and it's bad to generalize and perhaps I'm making this into far more of a situation than it really is, but time is flying and the bath-time-with-barbies feels like yesterday, so what's stopping this frame of mind from sticking around ten, twenty or thirty years from now?
On top of that, things at home have been rocky. I'm not about to spill this much of my guts into blogland, but with my dad being unemployed for the first time in twelve years and my brother being an adolescent asshole, it's been really uncomfortable even sitting in my room. Here is your opportunity to take advantage of me not wanting to be a hermit anymore! If anyone is willing to give me an excuse to get the hell out of my house, I'll gladly accept!
So there you have it. A once in every couple of months occurrence where I'm somewhat of a conformist! But don't get your hopes up with that "if I jump off a bridge, will you follow?" scenario. We all know I'd kvetch to the moon and back just getting there.
Anyways, it's become pretty apparent to me that most adults, even well into their thirties still have that indecisiveness and I'm not sure if I find that comforting or horrifying. I'm sitting here trying to comprehend the idea of permanently feeling this way and never having that aforementioned self-realization and the mere thought is completely mind-baffling. Sure, everyone's different and it's bad to generalize and perhaps I'm making this into far more of a situation than it really is, but time is flying and the bath-time-with-barbies feels like yesterday, so what's stopping this frame of mind from sticking around ten, twenty or thirty years from now?
On top of that, things at home have been rocky. I'm not about to spill this much of my guts into blogland, but with my dad being unemployed for the first time in twelve years and my brother being an adolescent asshole, it's been really uncomfortable even sitting in my room. Here is your opportunity to take advantage of me not wanting to be a hermit anymore! If anyone is willing to give me an excuse to get the hell out of my house, I'll gladly accept!
So there you have it. A once in every couple of months occurrence where I'm somewhat of a conformist! But don't get your hopes up with that "if I jump off a bridge, will you follow?" scenario. We all know I'd kvetch to the moon and back just getting there.
posted by Katy at 12:42 PM
1 Comments:
I knew you had to conform to something . . :-)
Anywho, definitely interested in football games, and if I don't have to work I'd stand in line with you guys for tickets. Shouldn't be too bad, unless we try for civil war...
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